Spy in July: Bond Never Dies

Most Bond aficionados would agree that one has a soft spot for the film he or she entered the series with. In this retrospective, I've finally reached that point, and though I won't write about the film for a few paragraphs still, Pierce Brosnan is, for all intents and purposes, my generation's Bond.

It's with a slightly heavy heart, then, that today, I mostly write about my misgivings with this period in 007 history. It's not as if there's nothing to celebrate in "The Brosnan 4," but greatness is almost entirely absent. This is Bond going through the motions. This is Bond without much of an identity. This is Bond at its least inspired.

But at least we have Goldeneye. Brosnan's first go-around as Bond, James Bond is pretty freakin' fantastic. It's directed by Martin Campbell (a name worth remembering), and filled with fun, new characters. Sean Bean plays Alec Trevelyan, 006, while Famke Janssen portrays Xenia Onatopp, a woman who squeezes men to death with her legs during sex. Robbie Coltrane is Valentin Dmitrovich Zukovsky, an adversary-turned-ally if you follow the old adage "The enemy of my enemy is my friend." And Joe Don Baker (the villain from The Living Daylights) pops up as Felix Leiter stand-in Jack Wade. Then, there are the new takes on old friends. The aptly named Samantha Bond gives her first performance as Miss Moneypenny (she's great; a real step up in the charisma department from the Dalton-era Moneypenny, Caroline Bliss), while Judi Dench moves into M's office. A real stroke of genius that sex change/casting choice was.

Brosnan's Bond is probably closest to Roger Moore's, as he does the suave gentleman with a quick wit quite well. In Goldeneye, the story is personal, which gives the character an edge that's missing in some of the actor's later films. The plot is well-executed and relatively grounded, and there are some genuinely standout action sequences, including a tank chase through St. Petersburg that ranks right up there with the most impressive in the series.

Bond had been successfully reinvented once again, even if this incarnation was a lot like the one we saw in the late 1970s and early 1980s. Unfortunately, the momentum doesn't carry over into 1997, when Tomorrow Never Dies (the 18th official James Bond film) went head to head with Titanic at the box office. Of course, this film doesn't come close to matching Cameron's in terms of box office, but it held its own well enough. It's that Tomorrow Never Dies falls so short of Titanic (as well as Goldeneye) in terms of quality that's so disappointing.

And it's far from the worst James Bond film. I should make that clear. In fact, it's probably the "Stirred" film that's closest to being "Shaken," if you're looking at my unique way of rating these films. The problem is that Tomorrow Never Dies is sleepy. There are some fun set pieces, but everything—the action, the performances—feels choreographed and artificial. The plot and villain are both absurd—a Rupert Murdoch-like media mogul named Elliot Carver (a never worse Jonathan Pryce) attempts to goad the U.S. and China into war by manufacturing a diplomatic crisis. There's just no umph to this film.

It was directed by Roger Spottiswoode, who's work is mostly nondescript, but his presence is indicative of a larger change behind the scenes; With this and Goldeneye, the James Bond films are now out of the hands of their usual crew of directors. Take a look at the guys who helmed the earlier films—Terrence Young, Guy Hamilton, Lewis Gilbert, John Glen; They were all 007 lifers for lack of a better word. Glen, who directed all of the 1980s Bond films, was an editor and second unit director on three films earlier in the series. Both Hamilton and Gilbert directed films, left the series, and came back for more. It was a club of sorts, but the 1990s started the trend that continues to this day of bringing in more high-profile directors for a one-time gig.

For the 19th James Bond film in 1999, The World Is Not Enough, a director with even more clout than Campbell or Spottiswoode is given the reins. Michael Apted is probably best known for his ambitious documentaries known as The Up Series. He'd also directed a few well-known dramas—Gorillas in the Mist, Coal Miner's Daughter—and down the line a bit, he'd make one of the Narnia films. The title of his James Bond film is an allusion to On Her Majesty's Secret Service. When Bond is preparing to go undercover as a genealogist, a bit of his own family history is uncovered and shared with the audience. The Bond family motto: "The world is not enough."

This film takes us to parts not yet seen in the 007 series. Much of the plot hinges on oil, and as such, we visit oil-rich (or at least pipeline-friendly) nations such as Azerbaijan and Kazakhstan. It's a nice change of pace from the standard European capital tour or the generic tropical island setting. However, everything starts in London at the offices of MI6, where a billionaire named Robert King has just been killed. The bomb that did the job was delivered by Bond (unbeknownst to him, of course), so after a thrilling boat chase, a serious arm injury, and a surprisingly quick recovery (not really...he just sleeps with his doctor to get a clean bill of health), Bond tracks down Elektra King (Sophie Marceau), Robert's daughter.

Elektra was kidnapped years ago by a man named Renard (Robert Carlyle). Now, Renard is back with a terminal condition (bullet in the brain) that's apparently making him stronger and stronger by the minute. The bullet is killing off his senses, meaning he feels no pain, and M believes he wants to finish the job with Elektra before kicking the bucket.

Things switch gears about halfway through as Elektra's motives come into question and a nuclear bomb enters the equation. That's when we meet Dr. Christmas Jones (Denise Richards), the hands-down-worst Bond girl—nay, character—the series has and will ever see. Let me just emphasize this: Denise Richards (yes, the former Mrs. Charlie Sheen) plays one of the world's leading nuclear scientists. It's just crazy. Whoever thought that was a good idea should never work in film again. There's no telling how good The World Is Not Enough could have been without such a horrible character/performance, but there's no denying she singlehandedly knocks this one down a few pegs on the 007 ladder.

At least there's Sophie Marceau. Elektra is one of my all-time favorite Bond supporting characters. She's a real loose cannon with many shades of gray in her personality. Her relationship with Bond is one of the most passionate and personal of the series, and she helps get Brosnan's best performance of his tenure out of him.

So three films in and the Brosnan era hasn't been too bad, right? Goldeneye was great. The World Is Not Enough passed the test. Tomorrow Never Dies was weak, but not terrible. Well, Die Another Day is next, and it ends Pierce's ride in stunningly awful fashion. Ladies and gentlemen, this is just an abysmal movie and easily the low point of the series so far.

What's worse is that Die Another Day starts out somewhat promising. Bond is undercover in North Korea dealing weapons to a Colonel Tan-Sun Moon (Will Yun Lee). The colonel's right-hand man, Zao (Rick Yune), discovers Bond's true identity quickly, and after a lengthy and comically CGI-filled hovercraft chase, 007 finds himself captured behind enemy lines. But at least Zao has been disabled, and Moon is dead.

He's tortured for months and months before being released without warning in a prisoner exchange for Zao, who now has diamonds literally embedded in his face (one of Bond's last clever moves before his imprisonment). Frustrated by the move, he disobeys M's orders and, once again, goes rogue, heading first to a Cuban genetics research facility where he meets the alluring Jinx (Halle Berry), and then to Iceland where his pursuit of Zao brings him face to face with Gustav Graves (Toby Stephens), a wealthy entrepreneur who has built himself both a palace made of ice and a giant space laser for purposes at yet unknown.

Though Bond never really felt grounded in the real world before, Die Another Day takes preposterousness to a new level. We've got this ridiculous ice hotel (it's not even that cold in Iceland...), which Graves decides to melt to the ground to kill Bond and Jinx, rather than just shooting them. Bond's car in this film has the ability to become invisible. There are plot points related to complete DNA transplants, men who don't sleep, and a vest that can destroy the world.

The only thing worse than the story's ridiculousness is the indescribably bad CGI during certain action sequences. Director Lee Tamahori wasn't exactly known as an action director (at least not in 2002), but there's no excuse for some of the embarrassingly phony shots in Die Another Day. There's this glacial car chase late in the film, which shows Bond racing to stay out in front of Graves space laser. Of course, the glacier melts, but he maneuvers to safety by detaching the car's hood and sort of "parasurfing" it to the ground. Even as a 14-year-old action-movie mark, I thought that was fucking stupid.

"Fucking stupid" seems like a perfect way to wrap up the discussion of Die Another Day. Brosnan's seven-year, four-film stint as Bond ends with a familiar promise: "James Bond will return." No one knew at the time, however, the hoops Barbara Broccoli (Cubby's daughter, who took over after he passed away during Brosnan's run) and company would have to go through to bring our hero back to the big screen. And once again, he was due for a fresh face. By 2006, we'd learn that along with that fresh face would come an origin story that would change the Bond world for better and forever.

My Brosnan rankings:
Goldeneye—Shaken
Tomorrow Never Dies—Stirred
The World Is Not Enough—Shaken
Die Another Day—Stirred

THE END
OF
"BOND NEVER DIES"

JOHN GILPATRICK WILL RETURN
in
"A ROYALE REBOOT"